why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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