My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize