one might say we're banned from that church
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize