If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
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