I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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