Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize