well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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