booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize