Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
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