I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
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Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
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If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
The ass gains better be worth it
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