Have you finally orgasmed yet?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
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