You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
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