I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
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We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
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How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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