I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize