i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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