I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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