just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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