Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize