Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize