if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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