omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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