This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
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A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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