what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize