Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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