I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize