So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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