The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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