I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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