wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize