Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize