Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
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