Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
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No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
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We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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