It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
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I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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