2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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