I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize