The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I AM VODKA MAN
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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