I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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