so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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