How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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