I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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