then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize