every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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