You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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