Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
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