The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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