last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
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I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
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you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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