We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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