Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
please come you make the beer taste better
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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