his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
They have beer where we have blood.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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