Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My ass is underappreciated
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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